Spiritual Depression

I believe that there is a spiritual explanation for depression, however it may be wisest to learn to treat depression both as a spiritual and medical condition.

I am not a doctor. I don’t know anything about the medical side of depression except for the limited experience I’ve had with a few medications.

I can however share with you my own experience of depression and the role it played in my life.

For me depression was the slow withdrawal of joy from all my activity; the things I used to get so much meaning from were losing their meaning.

This loss of joy made me fall back on some rather poor coping mechanisms which mostly involved a lot of alcohol.

What does this have to do with spirituality?

Detachment. Emotional and mental and physical detachment from everything that is not God, letting go of form, not by rejecting the material world but by transcending it.

God was trying to show me something I didn’t want to see; that I am truly and actually nothing. My deepest nature is nothingness.

All of this stripping away of joy made me angry, depressed, and anxious.

Anger, disgust, depression, and anxiety were the only moods I could swing between. I wallowed inside this negativity for years, thinking myself to be a holy martyr for staying with my family while I was being “victimized” by God.

And that’s exactly what it felt like for me; I was a “victim” of God’s neglect, but I didn’t know he was pulling me away from my addiction to form, to show me that I am nothing.

Humility, patience, kindness, and a lot of meditation brought me to a place where I could not only see what God was showing me, but could accept it fully.

Our truest selves are not made of flesh, but of light. God is drawing you closer to himself, this is the invitation. But to receive something new one must first put down what you are holding.

Right now we are holding on to our material life, not by consumerism, but by thought and desire. The material world consumes our thought and desires, distracting us from the love of God!

There is a way to live a normal looking life from the outside, while living an extraordinary life from within, in perfect companionship with God! This is the invitation.

Depression is a form of death. Let depression do it’s holy work in you (perhaps with a medication to help you through if that is your choice). But you must do so while keeping an open heart.

Depression is only deep suffering without the consolation of offering loving-kindness to everyone you meet without exception or expectation of repayment.

In summery:

God is in spirit, that is where we meet him. To go there we must walk away from form. Accepting that fully is detachment, which feels like depression.

Let depression do it’s holy work of destroying all thoughts and desires that are not centered in God himself, making room for Divine Love to enter in its void.

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